What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

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what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

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Why did the hipster's coffee burn his tongue? He drank it before it was cool.

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whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

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Where do dizzy cows go? In circles...

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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Why did the Chef go to jail? He killed his wife.

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A jew goes into a church. Yolo.

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What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -None, they will pay for somebody else to do it

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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Why was the Mexican running through the desert? A group of bandits had kidnapped his family, raped his sister, drowned his mother, decapitated his father, and now they were coming for him. They are coming...

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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