A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

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What do you call a fat, ugly kid? An unloved child.

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it

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What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

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An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

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Q.What happens when Torres scores A. He doesn't

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So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? -absolut vodka Well, you have a sirious drinking problem...

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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A man walks into a Bar, and he gets kicked out because its an animal only bar no people allowed

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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Why did the Elf stab the Gnome? Because I was on a bad acid trip.

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What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops