What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

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Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

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Where was the declaration of independes? At the bottom

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

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VITAMIN C!

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

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In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

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what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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