- Anti Joke

"My, what big teeth you have!" exclaimed Little Red Riding Hood. "Because I'm a wolf," explained the wolf. "And I dress in women's clothing because it makes me happier."

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

Why couldn't the woman drive? She was dead.

a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

Can i have a Ice Cream Kuhn?

My favorite part of the movie Frozen is when the parents die.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

Women's Rights Movement

What did one dinosaur say to the other? Nothing and if you think dinosaurs talk you might need to be diagnosed for having Schizophrenia. Invega is a subtle treatment.

Happy Birthday!! Have some meth cupcakes.

I remember in the 80's it felt like Bill Cosby was being shoved down my throat. He was always on TV with his show and those Jello commercials.

What is the difference between a baby and a log? I don't have a log in my fireplace

Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs waterskiing? Skip

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops