What do you call a woman who can't walk? A paraplegic.

4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

A baby seal walks into a club.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

the holocaust

Ok,here's one, my brother can sometimes do it! Ok. Think of a number between 1 and 10 Add ten Add ten Add ten Add five Add five Take away your original number \~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\ _______________________________________ Is your number NOW, 40? Was your original number 6? Click thumbs up if that WAS your answer! ????????

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? Perhaps he was doing a project on tree-life.

Knock knock Who's there Evan Evan who Evans erectile area is largo with Sarah plains pudding

Why did the horse insult the postage stamp? He didn't. Horses can not speak English nor can anything verbally or physically critique a postage stamp and make it feel any emotional distress.

Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

How do you prevent a baby from crawling all over the place? You nail his hands to the floor

Why did the little girl fall of the swingset. She got kidnapt and raped by a giant scorpion.

Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Doesn't matter get in the van.

Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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