Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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how to name your chinese kid. throw a spoon dow the stairs

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How do you send Harry Potter a post card? Get an owl to send it to his house.

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How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench. The bucket.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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How do you teach a kid to ski you strap it to the back of a polar bear

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24

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Why did all the boys come to my yard? Because of My milkshakes

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What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

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Q: What's the best part of having sex with twenty-seven year olds? A: By age twenty-seven the average person has reached sexual maturity, and has also developed mentaly enough to understand, and subsequently process the intimate nature of an adult relationship.

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What's Blue and tastes like orange cake? A blue cake.

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One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

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You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

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Whats from Hattersley? Someone who lives in Hattersley.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in face! Why didn't she get back up? Because she didn't have any friends!

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A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

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"Almost as accidental as your spelling I'm afraid." -...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops