Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

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Why did the black man steal the mountain bike? He didn't. He purchased and payed for the mountain bike.

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Why did the boy fail his final? His severe depression and progressive detachment from reality caused him to hang himself the night before

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should i know, i do not speak chicken.

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If you dislike this you are a homosexual (watch how many dislike this)

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why did the boy get hit by a bus because he dropped his ice cream

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What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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hi, my name is zack, i have a boner from the girl to my right(;

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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what is the difference between lizzy and a momma hippo........ lizzy doesnt bathe.

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I took a vampire out for dinner last night. I expected her to cringe when I ordered a rare steak, but we decided not to let my tastes impact on the evening, sharing wine and many stories before heading back to my apartment.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

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Why did the little girl's pet bunny pass away? Because her neighbor ripped out it's vitals.

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Q: What did the angry German man say to the Ameican? A: I dont know, I can't speak German!

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Did you here about the man who dropped a glass? It broke.

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Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

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A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and legs? Simply a pillow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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