What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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So there was a jewish guy, a black guy, and a white guy all sky diving. They all had an amazing time and they all went to a bar later to talk about what they just had experienced.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would think at least one of them would've seen it.

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? ........finding a worm in your apple.

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Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

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jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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A man was shot. He died.

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

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why did joe diragi cross the road there was food on the other side

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

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How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

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How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

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Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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