How do you get birds to land in your back yard? With a gun.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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how big is a black mans penis? idk ask his wife

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Why do Christian protest against gay marriage? They protest because they believe gay marriage is a sin.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

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Ever heard nobobys perfect well ill name my kid nobody therefore he will perfect

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

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what do you get when you cross ruddell with a chicken? still a prick

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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Why was the pig squealing? Because all four of its legs were tied together and it was about to have it's head chopped off so the meat could be processed for people to enjoy.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

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how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

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What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it was tree

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One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

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why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

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That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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