whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

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What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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whats fun about the governement's jokes? nothing, they are actually serious

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A Muslim on a plane yells out "Hijack!" Jack replies with "Hello" and the two engage in a casual conversation for the duration of the flight.

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Why was the black man in school detention? For sleeping in and showing up late accidently

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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angelo snyder is not ga

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

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Nothing if you heard a loud sound or something that was me dropping the phone, by accident, its busted, I will call you when and if all of your "facts" turn out to be true, Hey, had no idea my doppelganger would be so down to earth by the way, so I am sleepy, what about you?

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A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

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One day an irishman walked into a bar. he started to show off his accent when a nicely dressed lady said to him, "are you from ireland?". "AYE" said the irshman. " what part of ireland are you from?" drunk, the irishman replied "uh downtown" then the woman said, " did you come here alone?" then he replied"no i didn't come here a'lone.....DONKEY!!!"

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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