A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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So two guys walk into a bar and the third one ducks

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

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How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

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How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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What did the black girl say when sho dropped her phone? Oh crap, I dropped my phone.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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What's the worlds most popular burger? The Krabby Patty

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A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

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why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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