What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

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A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

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I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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Like this if you have a big diick like me Dislike if you have a baby diick Ignore if you're a girl and get back in the kitchen

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A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

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What's the difference between a black cat and a black cat? Nothing.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live on at the bottom.

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The Holocaust.

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How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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have you seen Helen Keller's bird house? neither has she

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Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

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What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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