A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

What happens when your read this? you don't laugh

Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

Why the FFUUU did you go back? Because I broke something huur.

BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

What's 9+10? 19

Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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