Knock Knock The doors already open

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

THAT'S RIGHT, BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER BOUGHT. LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB IT DID ON THIS PAGE YEAH! I RECKON IT IS THE BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER DIDN'T SEE

person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

Why did the little girl lose her necklace? Because she got her head blown off

What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

What do you call Morgan Freeman at a family reunion? Morgan Freeman.

What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley.

If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

Why are roses red ? Ass in my face .

Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

What is the difference between a park bench and a Mexican? The park bench can actually suport a family A. Woj

Your mother is so ugly it affects her self esteem.

How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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