Have you ever heard of a goose?

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

What do you do to a little boy who just called you fat? Throw a rhino at him!

Why couldn't little Suzie snap her fingers? Her stepfather cut off her fingers after becoming a drunk and leaving her family.

What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

What's black and white and red all over? My dog after she was hit by a car (true story)

Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? Their skin color.

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroy his family and career.

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she was a very poor worker.

What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four because snakes don't have legs.

What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

Knock Knock Who's there? There's a peephole on your door why don't you go ahead and look

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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