Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

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How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

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How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

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Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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When will Abe Vigoda be alive again? Never. There will never again be a time when Abe Vigoda will be alive. For example, Abe Vigoda will be dead for the entirety of the year 2038. He will continue to be dead if we move forward to the year 2091, and even if we keep jumping forward throughout history, stopping in the years 2250, 2871, and 3546, we will not land in an era when Abe Vigoda will be alive. Another way to look at this is to imagine Abe Vigoda had died in earlier years. Let's say he had died in 1902. Would he be alive today? The answer, sadly, is no. We get the same answer if we suppose Abe Vigoda had died in 1822, 1715, or ~ 85,200,000 BPE. To sum up, it is not precisely accurate to say that Abe Vigoda will be dead for a very long time. That implies a limit on the amount of time he will be dead. There is no limit.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your dog pooped on my lawn Now my violets are even more blue

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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So an African American man and another man of Hispanic, more specifically Mexico, are riding in the backseat of a car, who's driving? Probably their private chauffeurs, but most definitely not someone related to the Police Department.

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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What do gay kittens eat? Cat food. Friskies and Fancy Feast are both popular brands.

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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what do you call a black man who bakes bread? a baker. you racist.

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Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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