I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

When life gives you lemon, Squeeze lemon juice in life's eyes Rape it And demand oranges

Why did Jane break up with DeShawn? Cause they grew apart

why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

Two muffins are cooking in the oven, they say nothing to one another as muffins can't talk

Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they're all dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

"I know it. I can feel it in my nuggets." -Chicken Joe

What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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