Whats the quickest way to get famous? kill the president

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

Q: what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We're both lawyers!

Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

There are two muffins in an oven. Since they are inanimate objects, they do nothing but sit there and bake until they are a golden brown color, at which point a man takes them out of the oven and eats them for breakfast.

how does a a fat person dance? with his feet

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

What starts with F and ends with UCK? FUCK

Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

A man said lol, I said lol back. Then he started to beat me up for repeating his phrase!

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

an dislexik nam rwote hits

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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