What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

that moment when the last few ceral are like "Come on catch me bitch"

Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

A house comes around the corner.

So one time there was this woman learning...

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

I have an idea! You leave.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

A man named Jake walks into a bar. The bartender says hi jake... The End

2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

Whats the difference between a cow and another cow Help my dogs eating me

A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

What did the guy day to the other guy with an afro on his head? You look like a guy with an afro on his head.

Q. How do you make time fly? A. It is highly impossible to make time fly for there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute so therefore the time flows how it should and we do not have such power to do it even though many people claim they do when they know they really don't

How Do You Fart Eat Beans

What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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