what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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Magic Johnson has AIDS

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Arrow to the Knee

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What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

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What is as dry as a bone? A bone

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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Why are there so many jokes about people walking into bars? Bars are known as a place most people go to for a social occasion, making them a place that most people can relate with.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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Look at your hand. Made you look!

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Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

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Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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What's bad for your teeth? A brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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