a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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Why? Because racecar.

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Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a horrible pedophile and has deeply seeded emotional problems

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Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

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why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

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What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

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95556

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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