A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

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What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

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A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

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Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

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A Jew walks into a wall with a boner. He breaks his nose.

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i woke up in the middle of the night and my entire bed was wet... know what i did? i layed a towel down and went back to sleep

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Hey. I came up with an anti-joke. I posted it here.

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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nick and a mexican were in a falling plane.. nick ate the mexican... that is all..

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A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots, "Long day?", the bartender asks. "Yeah", the man replies, then he goes home and hangs himself

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Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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what is the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? you take your shoes off before you jump on the trampoline.

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

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How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a shot. The bartender asks to see his I.D. The man explains that he had lost his I.D. earlier in the day. The bartender then asked the man to leave, so he left.

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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