What do you call black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist bastard

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What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

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Why did the beautiful woman marry the ugly poor old man? She was blonde & was therefor not aware that he wasn't rich nor younge.

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tradegy.

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Doctor: I got bad news and worse news Patient: Whats the bad news? Doctor: You have 24 hours to live Patient: Whats the worse news? Doctor: Your mom died this morning

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Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

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What did the PC say to the Mac? Nothing you idiot! Computers can't talk.

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oh whatever donald trump's not going to be president. stop pretending he is

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Why did the police officer shoot the man in the wheelchair? Says the police: "He was running"

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

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What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

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A black man, a Rabbi, a circus clown, a soldier and the Pope all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, 200 l.b.s

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roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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Why did Polly fall off her roof? Because her dad pushed her.

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Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

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Doesn't matter, had sex. Except for the STD's I possibly contracted.

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What did the apple say to the Banana? ....Nothing... fruit don't talk

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what's funny about cancer. nothing it is a serious life threating disease with no cure.

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A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse begins bucking wildly, injuring three patrons before breaking through the front door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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