Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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masturbating on a tarc bus

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What happened to the fish? It drowned

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Q: Why did the girl have dirty knees? A: Cause she was dragged through the forest and raped.

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Your mama so fat that when she cut herself gravey came out and we drank it too!

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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what did the guy do at the funeral? cry because his wife died

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Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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How do you scare a brunette? Hide behind a door or wall until the unsuspecting person walks by, then jump out and yell.

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What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

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Yo mama so stupid, she waited for the stop sign to say go

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

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Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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What comes after 69... Mouthwash

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If life gives you lemons, You have a problem and you might need medicine.

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What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

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why did the man hop everywhere? He only had one leg

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what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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