What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

What's your guys names?

Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

How come Asian's are so clever? Their baby food is blended textbook paste.

Why did the skeleton cross the street. He didn't.

Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like cows, Cows are cool

Who wants $300? Me too.

What do you call a man who has lost both his legs, one arm, and half his eye? Larry

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

Where's my tractor?

Why did the Michael lose the race? Because he had no legs.

What do you call two babys with one head? I dont know either, answers on postcard please!

Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

What do you say when you walk into an optical? "Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?"

what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

Jims family is having a picnic. Jim goes and gets his food. shortly after he drops his food. Jim is really sad and goes and gets more food. Jim is black

Boxing on Boxing Day

When life gives you a pack of Kools, make Kool-Aid.

What's the difference between a Rabbi and a Priest? One's a Jew, one's a Christian

why didnt little timmy finish his test he was eaten by a muslim rhino... .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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