Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Because he felt like it okay!!! Just let him be!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

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Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

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Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

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What do you call a black male teacher? A: A Teacher .

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Why should you never trust anglers? Because they're always into fishy business... Why should you never trust hunters? Because they carry loaded guns...

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure _._._

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What's the biggest difference between white and black people? the melanin levels in their skin.

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Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

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Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

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What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops