Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Bill Walters from across the street. How are we talking through a door?

What do you get when two chickens cross a road? -Salmonella stricken hobos

What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

The world blows up and everyone except for one man and his house make it out alive "Knock knock" "Whos there?" "Me" "Me who?" "Ummmm, its me, duh" It turns out the man was very bored and decided to go knock on his own door and tell knock knock jokes

Find the b dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

What's an anti joke? Then I ate my digestive biscuit.

A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

Lol, thats funny, sorry for asking, but is your eye doing better? Was their IQ test the same one you get when you enter their site?

The original anti joke. What is jeopardy?

Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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