A moose walks into a grocery store. He goes over to a cashier and says, "On what aisle are the potates?" The cashier replies, "Aisle 4." The moose went to aisle 4 AND THERE WERE NO POTATOES!

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What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

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Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

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I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

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Do you know what has always angered me about people not choosing to control their own lives Nero?

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50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

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A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

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What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

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Patient: Doctor Doctor I think I have HIV! Doctor: Wtf to that one...

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Why did the n i g g e r steal money? because he was black! and wanted a KFC thanksgiving! :)

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm dying of AIDS so I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself"

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What's the difference between an orange? A duck.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An even better question is why are the chicken morals being questioned every time it feels like doing something.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

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Why does it take longer to build a Blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? The trip to find a blonde wig suitable for a snowman, especially if you are picky and have a certain wig in mind, generally takes up more time than not searching for a wig at all.

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her.

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whats brown and fluffy? brown fluff

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops