What time did the Chinese man go the dentist? About 5 minutes prior to his appointment

I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car!

Person 1:Did you hear the joke about the cat, the camera, and the pancakes? Person 2: No, I haven't. Person 1: Oh, that's too bad. Person 1 then gets up and walks into a refrigerator.

How old are you? 7

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

Yo mammas so fat you know what, i think she might die!!

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

What happened to my sunglasses?

What do you call an argument between a Jew and a German? World War 2

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver? Cause she was blind, def, and mute. Thus making it difficult to drive.

What did the baby get for his birthday? An Abortion.

Philosoraptor, turds IM A SPAMBOTz B=Not really, just blind.

What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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