What did the sad orphan with liver cancer get for Christmas? Pictures of dead babies to put things in perspective.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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What was going through the minds of the Sandy Hook victims? Bullets.

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Why didn't the lolipop taste like anything to the boy beacuse he was aborted

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

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what tall and looks like a jew?

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What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

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how many jews fit in an oven? none, its illegal to put a person in an oven....

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

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What do you say to a cashier? How much is it?

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

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Your mom is so old she died

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Q: What's worse than finding a hundred dead babies, in one bin? A: Finding one dead baby, in a hundred bins.

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Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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What did Pablo experience during his first day in private school? the atmosphere of a private school

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Your mom is so poor that she collect food stamps is on welfare and lives in section 8 housing and cannot find a job that provides her a livable wage

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops