What's brown? My toilet hahaha

Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

You might be redneck if you are... Indian

Want to hear a good joke? The NBA.

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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