roses are red leather is black when god made you he was smoking crack

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Two scientists walk into a bar, the pair walk up to the counter and the first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have some H2O too." 10 minutes later, the second scientist dies.

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Hi i want a cheeseburger and a small fry, said bob. And then, said the guy taking the order. thats all, said bob. And then, said the guy. Ummmm ok well i take small coke, said bob. And then, said that guy. Thats all, said bob. and then, said the guy. whatever i'll take a milkshake, said bob. And then, said that guy. and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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Whta's the difrence betwen a goat and a hors? The goat goed too eet the hors thre day ago!

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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What's bigger than a breadbox? Whitney Houston's coffin.

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One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

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What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating.

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what do you call a black guy african american

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

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How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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Why do blind people laugh at this joke? Because they can't read it and everyone else is laughing.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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