3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A Black Guy, A Rabbi, And A Mexican walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says "Get Outta Here We're Closed!"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the man need new glasses? He was thrown off a bridge by a leprechaun.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Friend's are like penguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

man, i read a lot but the are some words i can pronounce

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination" and then he was resuscitated and became an atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the Soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin in the air.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

a young boy once lost his mind and then his parents weeped because their son had been decapatated in a horrible motorcycle accident caused by a drunk who had just killed his wife and children and was running from the cops....

thumb_up thumb_down -29

i don't hate you because your fat ...your fat because i hate you

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops