What did the man say when he lost his keys? I lost my keys. What did the man say when he saw an elephant in the distance? There is an elephant in the distance.

Why do bitches love cheese toast? 'Cuz bitches love cheese toast

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms.

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

where's mom I killed her

Whats green and fluffy? Your mom.

Why are pills white? Cause they work.

Person 1: "Broo my dicks like 19 inches!" Person 2: "Thas not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you."

What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

Q: What happened when the rich man got married? A:His wife stole everything he had and left him a cold and broken man.

Do you believe in Santa? Cuz i don't. Kookaburra

What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

Cleveland sports, lebron james' ever receding hairline

A man walks into a bar. A few hours later he walks out.

Did you know that Helen Keller had a swing set? neither did she.

How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

Why can't Ray Charles see his friends? He's blind. Also he is dead.

what is funnier than 24.....?????? 69. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. IT IS FUNNY BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE ME AND YOUR MAMA

A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. He's not really a chicken, he's just called a chicken because he is always afraid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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