A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

66

Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

So a seal walks into a club...

Knock knock

What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

A black guy gets arrested...

I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...