How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

A blind man walks into a wall.

An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

Around 10PM on a Saturday two Irishmen walk into a bar. They order up a round of drinks, and comment on the appearance of several women in the place whom they believe to be single. After finishing up their drinks, the one Irishman asks the other if he'd like another one. The other says no, that he promised his wife he'd be back soon with diapers for the baby. He thanks his friend for the drink and leaves for home. The remaining Irishman orders up another "round" from the bartender, but really it's only one drink he is ordering, being he is only one person.

Hi

Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

Frontbut-

Knock-knock? Who's there? I... I dunno I was planning on thinking of a joke before you said who's there, but I ran out of time.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

What's white and sticky? A marshmellow.

you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes Wtf?

Q. What do you call a woman who, after 72 hours of hard labor, finally gives birth? A. Mom.

What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

Shape like a book, have papers like a book, have a cover like a book, and could be read like a book. But it's not a book, what is it? A dictionary

Two black guys are seen running out of a convenient store. They've just received word that two planes crashed into the twin towers, both their sons worked maintenance on the 73rd floor.

Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

What's brown and liquidy? Brown paint.

You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

Why was the Asian girl doing a math problem? It was her homework that her teacher assigned her class.

How can you tell if an elephant has been in your fridge? Broken fridge.

My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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