Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

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why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

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Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

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Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

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Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

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roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

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Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

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Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

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what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the moose cross the road? Migration.

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What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

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If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

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Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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