Why was the boy sad? His parents died in a horrible accient earlier that day.

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roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

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What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

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Why do I exist? Because my mom gave birth to me.

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How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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A rapist walks into a bar. He is promptly arrested afterwards.

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What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

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How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

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What did Mel Gibson say to his wife? I apologise for my rude behaviour and intolorable cursing.

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q

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

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Why Did The Black Man Cry? KFC Went Bankrupt!

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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A man punches a 3rd grader in the stomach. Not long after he is arrested and no longer is allowed within 500 feet of a public school.

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What did the man say to th tiger? Nothing, a tiger is a dangerous and vicious animal. It then ripped him to pieces. Is family mourned after for a very long time till they came to grips with the death of the main income in their family. Aids

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

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yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Such a statement assumes that life is an actual person, which is impossible. Thus, you do not need to concern yourself with what you must do when life hands you lemons.

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How do you stop a bus? throw a boy with an ice cream cone infront of the bus. but...come to think of it, that may not work. he might drop the ice cream on top of it >:l

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what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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