Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

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Why did the boy fail his math test? Because his Mother threw a refrigerator at him.

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Q: How many Jews are there in Germany? A: None, they all died in the holocaust

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just in time?

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I have sexdaily. Sorry I mean dyslexia.

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A bunch of kids are in a treehouse. The treehouse falls out of the tree and kills everyone in the treehouse and the two little girls playing underneath. It was sad.

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Yo Momma so old, that she has arthritis.

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What do you call a man with cheese on his face? His name is David.

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If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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I named my son ps2 controller

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What's 9 + 10 19 AB

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What do you do when you see a black man limping in your yard? You invite him inside, ask him what happened, and possibly call an ambulance if, God forbid, the situation is that serious.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

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Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Timmy. YOU DON'T KNOW ME!!!!!

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What do you call a black man at school the janitor

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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Q: What do is it called when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A: Why give it a name when it is never goin to happen!

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. They both died of blood loss.

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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