What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

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My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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What does the average fishermen catch Fish

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How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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stfu Aodhan u and kevin are doin all the instigsating

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He has to on his commute to work. He is a taxpaying citizen who does his 8-5 job to try and cut out a decent living for his wife and kids, so stop questioning the route that he takes to get to work.

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Q: What's worse than finding a hundred dead babies, in one bin? A: Finding one dead baby, in a hundred bins.

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What did Pablo experience during his first day in private school? the atmosphere of a private school

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How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

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why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

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Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why did the black man buy ten packets of Kool-Aid at the supermarket? Because it is a refreshing beverage that many individuals enjoy drinking.

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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Roses are red, violets are black, you better watch your anus, cause jimmy is back!!

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

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A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? pretty much everything because dead babies aren't a laughing matter

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

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What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops