Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

Howdy stranger.... It is time for you to join! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! Moral: "HEY YOU! STFU! STFU! STFU! STFU!"

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

Gale swallows.

Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...