A rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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NEVER

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A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

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\ \ \\ \\ >\/ 7 _.-(6' \ (=__._/` \ ) \ | / / | / > / j < _\ _.-' : ``. \ r=._\ `. \ > ,.-' >.'

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im saul and i love cock

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Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

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What do you a badass who not a badass. Grant Lousbury.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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2 men walk into a bar without thier shirts. They get kicked out. 2 women walk into a bar without thier shirts They got beaten almost to death Why? The men dressed up as women, and every hated them so much they beat the almost to death when 2 cops walk into that bar, see the men dressed up as women and they too beat them. Little do they all know that the men disguised as women are really secret goverment agents looking into a drug deal. The drug dealers got away and now we have 2 people sueing the police department and drugs on the street again. Oh yeah I almost forgot: I made this up so if you read it you're going to die withing the next 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 years. I gurantee it. If you dont the men in white coats are going to do extremely painful tests on you and you just might die so then no one will care and maybe get onto thier lives again. Why did I right this? It hasnt happened to me so I dont know If you tell me I will give you something more valueble than gold. Want to know what it is? TELL ME FIRST!!!!

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Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

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Women's Soccer.

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What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

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Your in Thailand on a Elephant ride... at the end you jump off but uncle jack is still on the elephant and the elephant wont let him off.... Do you help your uncle, Jack off the elephant?

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Why couldn't the Asian man satisfy a woman? He was in a coma.

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Yo mama's so fat that after her enima, she looked skinny and rather nice

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What do you call two babys with one head? I dont know either, answers on postcard please!

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CFL

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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A man driving through a thunderstorm said, "look, it's rain, dear." His wife, being a reindeer, took offense to that statement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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