Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can.

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I Hear Boston Is having a blast.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

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Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

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girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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Good to see you today!

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

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How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

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lebron

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops