Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike when you eat them they die

Why did the chicken cross the road? because potatos are invading russia

What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

what is not funny? This joke.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

What's round and red? A round and red solid.

Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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