Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

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How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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What's worse than finding a holocaust in your apple? A worm.

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What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

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A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, All you HATERS of Bieber, Go sick your mother.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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A princess decided to kiss a frog in the hopes that it would turn into a handsome prince, as she found none of her suitors to her taste. The frog was incredibly poisonous and she died of total organ failure three days later.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What's the difference between camping and molestation? I wasn't taken camping as a child

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what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

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what happened to the man who is standing in the rain? he got wet

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Q: What do you do when you see a man with no arms and no legs walking down the street? A: You wonder how the hell he is walking

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

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What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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