Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

Why did the woman drop her keys? She was being raped.

A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

Q: What's the best way to eat lasagna A: With a fork, although a spoon is a fine substitute

what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

How did the black guy survive the bus crash? At the time of the bus crash, it was a segregated community, therefore no black people were allowed on buses.

I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

What's round and orangey? An orange.

what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

What is the difference between a white mans penis and a black mans penis? It doesn't matter, phallic size isn't everything its what you do that defies you.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing. I don't know. Why? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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