Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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What happened to the man who lost his left arm, left leg and eye in an accident? I expect he claimed insurance, assuming he was prudent enough to insure himself, or his workplace complied with legislation.

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A Fat Kenyan

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A: Knock, knock. B: Who's there? The writer of this joke had no idea how to end this.

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I blackmailed his family with rape from Ronald mcdonald

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Don't turn around when you're talking to me. Why? You will walk off of that cliff

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What do you call a city that never sleeps? Cities cannot sleep; they merely represent a societal body of people living in a confined community. A city may have a prosperous night-life, however, cannot functionally "fall asleep" in the convential sense of the term.

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What did the priest say to the Atheist when he walked into the church? How are you?

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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why did the person die? He was 90 years old and was sick. Its natural

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What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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A car walks into a bar.

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HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

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What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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why was the boy crying he had cancer

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Roses are red violets are blue. Yes.

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

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What is the difference between a cow and a clam one is bivalve and one is a mammal

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Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

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Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops