Micael Jackson enters a bar. Everyone screams, and then someone runs over and pulls the cheap mask off the impersonator's face. Michael Jackson IS DEAD, get over it

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What do you call your mum without an umbrella? Saturated Fat

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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why does beyonce sing " to the left, to the left"? - cause black people have no rights

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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how did the cat call 9-1-1? very carefully as cats do not have opposable thumbs, making the whole situation rare, and semi-improbable.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Replacement Referees

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The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

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Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was nailed to the chicken

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what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

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What did the man with tourettes yell on an airplane? He yelled bomb, and was gunned down by 2 federal marshals, one of which's stray bullets happened to hit a small child with autism.

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

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Im 8 years old, sometimes I get sick, and I take medicine and it makes me feel better. My daughter has cancer.

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

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Was that last joke funny? Well this one isn't.

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Jayden Eccles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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