What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why was the little girl crying? she just watched her whole family get murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why did the physics major drop out of college? because he stumbled onto a finding that made him contemplate life so much that he needed to go to africa to study where the source of the finding where he later caught AIDS from an infected village person, he was later flown back to the US where he was cured out of a miracle but later hanged himself because he was not allowed to go back to africa and find out the meaning of life.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the clown chase the boy? The boy was sad and needed cheering up

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q. Why did the kid drop his tennis racket? A. Because he got run over by a tank!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's worse than Patrick in a blender. Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, idk.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

You say: Why did the chicken cross the road? Response: Why? (or some other answer to a different joke) You say: To get to your house! Knock, knock. Response: Who's there? You say: The CHICKEN!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Roses are red violets are blue I have herpees.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you call a bear. Rob.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

im gay

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why was the women not in the kitchen? She was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q-Whos the best server at Sonic? A-Kevin !

thumb_up thumb_down -35

*insert corny "a man walks into a bar" joke here*

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops