I began as a dreamer, then I became a visionary, then I saw my dream come true, until it shattered us all. Do you believe that perhaps, there are people out there, trying to stop the world from reaching a better age?

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A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel on his crotch, and the bartender says, "What's that?" and the pirate says, "A deadly tumor."

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Whats the difference between and ? Blue custard

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What do you call a man with a knife in his back? An ambulance

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One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

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Are you going to just stand there and watch me burn for i am on fire? Well that is fine because the sensation feels so fantastic. You are going to just stand there and listen to me whine the night away. It is quite okie-dokie for I really love your art of lying! To be certain, I love it very much! I can not find myself telling you what really occurred, I can only explain to you the sensation i felt from this moment. For I have a dagger in my trachea. For the number of days where the do not's fell like the actually do's. I will be very happy :). But where are you trying to walk away from. Than she told me she was leaving. I said no you very certainly are not! Megan Lady-who-sleeps-with-many-men (aka Whore) Fox. We find ourselves back on the day we met...... etc etc, lot's of pissed off Rapper vs. the English language. Than more words fly out of the mouth of the woman that said she "just wanted a hit" than got slapped around the ear by her ex. It is a pointless song. Today's youth is hopeless. (just kidding i love Eminem stay infinite for life)

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Why don't you ever stick your hand into the bottom of the jelly bean jar? Cuz' the black ones will steal your watch

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What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

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I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realising the apple is the worm...

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A: What Santa said when he caught Mrs. Claus with one of his elves... Q: What is "Ho ho ho?"

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how do you make a plumber cry A: kill his family

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A sober Amy Winehouse

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How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Half a shit.

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A man rode into town on friday and left on friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a week

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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I like doodle. XoXo Jamie

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Bare with me here, im gonna change this up a bit What's better then finding a worm in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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