What did Lois say to Peter? Who cares... Family Guy is a stupid show.

A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am couler-blind, and poetry is gay

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

What do you call a black guy who gives out change? A cashier.

What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

Why did Piglet look in the toilet? He was probably fascinated by the flush.

Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

My mother-in-law fell down a stairway. I turned to my wife and said “Call an ambulance!!”

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hook. Hook who? Who are you Hooking Your Horns to?

Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

what do you call a black person who hated fried chicken? a vegetarian.

Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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