Hitler, a Nazi, and a Jew walk into a bar. Only Hitler and the Nazi walk out. What happened to the Jew? He had to use the bathroom so he asked Hitler and his Nazi friend to wait in the car.

Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza is a tasteful meal and a Jew is a person of Israeli decent.

Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

why did the girl fall of the swing someone threw a refrigerator at her

Q: How many black guys does it take to black top a driveway? A: I can't give you a definitive answer unless I know the area to be covered, the thickness of material to be applied, and the capabilities of each individual working that particular day.

why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

Once there was a frog. My parents died.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

What's the deal with brown?

How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

i am and me is i

How do you confuse a blonde? Wait...what?

A guy walks into a bar and says 'Ow!'

Knock Knock Come in! :)

Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

Did you hear about the dyslexic that choked on his own vimto?

Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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